Lost post-grad genderqueerdo wanderer working through self-awareness and empowerment. Veggie-lover, biology & nutrition student, and hopeful nutritionist. I knit, learn code, paint, lindy-hop and I like to surround myself with kitschy creepy cute crap, with spikes. I'm an egalitarian that focuses on patriarchy, conflict resolution and communication.
People who think that no one uses welfare/food stamps to actually buy things they need can tell that to my hungry 11 year old self who wouldn’t have had decent lunches or meat (at all) without government assistance.
Oh, and who might have gone hungry if there had been drug testing involved. Thanks. I’m glad that you know more about my life than I do! If only I had realized sooner that my mom wasn’t really buying food with that money! I mean, I don’t know what she was doing with it, since our lives were fucking awful at that point and we had a grand total of zero luxuries (I shared a room with my mom! In the basement of my grandma’s condo! I did laundry for the whole house to earn enough dimes to buy myself sodas and candy!), but really, please, enlighten me.
Also, as a child of a drug addict, this law fucking terrifies me. The idea that some kid who is trying to cope with having an addict for a parent (not always easy) also might go hungry or without new clothes or whatnot because some privileged assholes think poor people have to be suffering saints to qualify for help literally makes me cry to think about.
YAAAS TO ALL OF THIS
All these bullshit “welfare reform” laws that are designed to fix some imaginary problem in the system that doesn’t exist all comes out of the perpetuation of the “welfare queen” stereotype that we love to vilify all the time.
When we think welfare we think poor black woman who’s having babies for extra government benefits who’s really just taking the government handouts to buy drugs, candy or brand new shoes or some shit…
Making laws based off stereotypes is NOT how we combat poverty. Its how we make the issue even worse
If my mom didn’t have foot stamps she would probably be not able to afford the frugal below poverty line living that she does now. My mom has been unemployed forever, deals with a serious case of bipolar and can barely keep track of conversations while having them. She smokes sometimes to help and if drug testing inhibited her from getting aid me and my brother would probably have been seriously fucked.
I spent most of my life being silent on shit that bothers me, and learning that when I open my mouth I willlose friends, Iwillbe cast out of social circles, Iwillannoy coworkers. I will be punished for believing that my humanity and the humanity of others is worthy of respect and more meaningful than jokes or snide comments.
That shit isn’t fun.
It isn’t fun to share interests and truly enjoy the company of people and later find out that they participate in dehumanizing and oppressive social structures.
It isn’t fun to want to have friends but know that they believe in really terrible stereotypes that perpetuate discrimination, violent crime, and more.
It isn’t fun to have to put up with microaggressions, and be considered “irrational” when you call them out.
It isn’t fun to tell people that something isn’t okay, only for them to feel put upon for having to think about their problematic shit.
It isn’t fun to be called “hypersensitive” when the reality is that the people around you are simply insensitive.
No fun at all.
Calling people on their shit is necessary but painful and isolating and times, so fuck anyone who thinks it’s something people derive pleasure from doing
Unfortunately this happens both ways when you officially define yourself as an egalitarian feminist. Shit gets real old when you don’t have one side you completely agree with, even if you agree with one concept more than the other.
Oh man this couldn’t come at a better time. I literally just made a list of all my previous ideas about paintings and art. The universe is telling me this is right (though honestly when didn’t it).
It’s even better when people decide that this is a good start into a conversation. Even more points when they decide to point out how hip their glasses also are.
Happy International Women’s Day! Cleaned out my queue by publishing the backlog of posts about women. I feel like this is a win-win situation.
This is why you should never leave the house.
Little Personal Rant:
Why can’t I be both a feminist and an MRA supporter? I don’t see why I can’t call everyone out on their shit and their hateful tactics including those who are misandrists on the feminist end and those who are misogynists (usually not MRA supporters but it still happens).
It’s scary to realize that 2012 never really happened. I probably wrote it down a thousand times, but to me it didn’t occur. The landmarks of the year were so minimal and experiences and emotions were so limited that it barely registers in my timeline. It feels like someone pressed the restart button and i’m once again a moving, somewhat willful and conscious person. I feel hope again, I feel like I might actually achieve something, and that I have some sort of value even if it’s probably not up to snuff with what i’m capable of. But i guess it’s better than sinking for so long that no lightness lifts you for months and you just become a marionette of someone you used to be. I’m worried that i’m going to go back to that place, since there really isn’t any reason that i’m out of it.
I’m not really sure how i’m going to make it. I have no idea where to go with my career and i’m running out of time. I don’t have time to figure out what i’m good at, what will make me stable enough to support my family and continue to prosper and develop with a changing work force. I don’t know who to even ask about for advice or career counseling and options.
Just because she’s __________ (pretty, smart, thin, attractive, charming, funny)
doesn’t mean you’re NOT ___________ (awesome, amazing, loved, worthy, unique, special, wicked, badass).
We notice differences among us: it’s not a bad thing. But internalizing what those differences MEAN (i.e. feeling ‘less than’ by comparison), is where the trouble starts. You ARE in control of how you let those messages bounce around inside your head.
Try re-framing how you compare yourself: what you have to offer is delicious to the people you care about MOST. :)